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This is the last part of our series on the Man Up series that we’re looking at together. This has been a four part series that I hope we’ve enjoyed and found ourselves challenged in. We’re going to end this series on Friday by watching the film Courageous. As a church, we sort of have a tradition on Good Friday. We like to get together as a church family, and we’ve typically watched a movie in the past like The Passion. This year we’re going to take a little bit lighter and watch courageous still emphasizing Jesus in our life. So I encourage you to come be a part of that. At 7:00 Friday, we’ll have popcorn, drinks, snacks and all that here for you to participate. Um, what’s important, though, is we look at this series together. Guys, I hope you recognize that God has called you and challenged you to be a man that reflects his image. And not just the men, but the ladies as well. God has called you for a particular purpose in this world to to live for something greater than just self and selfishness. God desires and has a plan for your life and men, your influence and your family and the world around you can’t be overstated enough. There was a book written by John Lennon that was published recently. Excuse me. It wasn’t written by John Lennon, but it was a biography of his life. And in that book, he he records how his father and the lack of his father being present in the home had a tremendous impact, negatively and influencing his life.
In fact, he attributed the lack of having a father around him to much of his depression. His depression. He was. He led to the encouragement in his life, he says, to the use of drugs. And at the height of beetle career. Of all the Beatles, John Lennon was a Beatle, if you didn’t know that. I’m sure most of you knew that. But at the height of the career, there’s three years that the Beatles were just on top of the world, they say, and reflect on John Lennon’s life, that he remembers very little of it because he was so heavily involved in drug use. In fact, at one point in the book, there was a comment made from John Lennon that says, why don’t dads love and need their children like children love and need their fathers? Seeing the lack of a father’s love and a child’s life goes into their eyes and into their heads. He later wrote a song called Strawberry Fields, which was a song wishing his father would have stayed with him and he could have experienced that relationship with his dad forever. Another popular song in our culture that’s reflected the influence of a father. You’ve probably heard the song but can’t remember the author. I’ll tell you, it’s a one hit wonder by a man named Harry Chapman, and it’s called The Cat’s in the cradle.
At one point in the song, it says this. My son turned ten just the other day. He said, thanks for the ball, dad. Come now, let’s play. Can you teach me to throw? I said, not today. I’ve got a lot to do. He said, that’s okay. And he walked away, but his smile never dimmed and said, I’m going to be like him. Yeah, you know, I’m going to be like him. The dad later reflects in the song that says, well, he came home from college just the other day, so much like a man. I just had to say, son, I’m proud of you. Can you sit for a while? He shook his head and said with a smile, what I’d really like to do, dad, is to borrow the car keys. See you later. Because can I have them, please? I’ve long since retired. My son’s moved away. I can, I called him up just the other day. I said, I’d like to see you, if you don’t mind. He said, I’d love to, dad, if I can find the time. You see, my new job’s a hassle and the kids have the flu. But it’s sure nice talking to you, dad. It’s been sure nice talking to you. And as I hung up the phone, it occurred to me he had grown up just like me. My boy had grown up just like me and the cats and the curtains came.
Skin. Yeah. You know what? I think so many kids. If we could just open up their hearts and allow them to reflect us, the significance of us parents in their lives, what they would desire is that they could live in a home where mom and dad would love each other. A home where they could be loved and protected and cared for. And as men this morning, I hope that is your desire as ladies this morning as well. I hope that is your desire. It’s a God given desire. In fact, Paul says in Ephesians chapter six and verse four, we’re just going to focus on this one verse today. We’re going to look how Scripture weaves in the theme of this verse throughout the Bible. But Paul writes to fathers, we looked at Ephesians four last week that really set for us the structure of all relationships in this world. And Paul was setting us up for Ephesians chapter five, which then defines it, particularly in the marriage relationship. We get to the end of Ephesians five and then drops and jumps into the role of parents towards their children. In verse six, chapter six and verse four, it says to us as fathers, fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. I like this. Let me make it real simple for us as dads.
The first two words fathers do. There’s a responsibility that God has placed upon your shoulders to be an example and light to your children. And it’s particularly worth recognizing in our lives, as we’ve seen even in our own culture, how John Lennon and and Harry Chapman have recorded that the, the, the fathers within the homes in America seem to be absent and from fulfilling their role that God has called them to. And so the responsibility that Paul just identifies in the first two words our fathers do. It’s about men being men and taking responsibility for your kids. I want to talk about fathers. Do. What’s important to recognize is that it’s not always going to be done perfectly, is it? I can think when Grayson was born in our lives, I have all the experience in the world as a parent now with a two year old child. Right. But when he was born in our lives, I can remember the first day that he came out and and I saw on. I’m thinking, and when is the nurse going to hand me the manual? Right. How do you operate with this thing? What is it you’re supposed to do? We began to bring him up in instruction and discipline, as this verse says, and we teach them right from wrong in this world, grace, and begin to express something. Very early on in his life, we told him no. He liked to bang his head against the wall.
He performed his own discipline out of frustration. What do you do with that? As parents, God didn’t give us a particular model with every kid. As you know, when you have children, no child is exactly the same. But what’s important that Paul says to us is that follows you understand the responsibility to get up and do. It’s not always going to be perfect, but God has called you to get the job done. After all, when it comes to raising children, you don’t get to relive those moments. You don’t get to go back to a particular day and time and correct mistakes that you made. You’ve got one shot. God has called you in this world, as it told us in this verse, fathers, do. Let me write it back up here for you. It says, fathers do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. God has an idea for which he wants you to do as you raise your child up. What we do as fathers, when God talks about doing, is we do our best to reflect Jesus into their lives. You think about when we talk about parenting children that God has already modeled for us as a father would care before his kids. And a lot of what parenting means as parents is just simply modeling Jesus. And so Paul tells us, as he mentions to us, fathers do.
He gives us a particular direction. This is not simply about doing whatever you please, or just finding any old guide to bring your kid up. But he says in Ephesians six four, bring them up in instruction of the Lord. Paul instructs parents that that way the the parents could then instruct their children by which they should raise up their children. And so the theme and idea of Paul’s mind was, okay, you’ve seen Ephesians four and how we function in this world, in relationships. You’ve seen in Ephesians five the way that you live this out in your married life. Okay? Now instruct your children the way in which you’re to live out the instruction of the Lord in this world. And so if I thought this morning about what Paul’s telling us in his concept here in this passage of Scripture, Paul saying that the goal of parenting isn’t to raise good kids, it sounds crazy, right? Sometimes we would just settle for that, wouldn’t we? Just be good? We’re going in public. But the goal of parenting isn’t to raise good children. The goal of parenting is to raise godly children. Anybody can come up with any definition of what good is. Matter of fact, the world has all sorts of philosophies of what they think you should and shouldn’t do with your child, right? Television wants to share with your child all the things that they need to do.
Axe body spray. All kids need it, right? But the goal of Ephesians is that we understand that the path for which God wants us to bring our children up into this world is not to be good children, but to be godly children. See, God’s goal for your life is the same goal for your children’s lives. In fact, he says it in Corinthians, but we all with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory. God is saying, as we look to the Lord for our instruction, as we align ourselves with Jesus rather than anything else in this world, we begin to reflect Jesus. In this world, we look like Jesus. And God’s goal for your kids is to look like Jesus. So how do we do that? I would say this God’s goal for us is to raise godly children, and the way that we raise godly children is to seek after the hearts of our children, and not the conduct of our children. Does that make sense? The goal of parenting is to seek after the heart of your children and not the conduct of your children. See, about being good is simply behavior modification. But being godly is about a heart transformation. A kid can simply modify his behavior without ever giving his heart. When we talk about Jesus being a model to us as people and what we’re to reflect in this world, Jesus himself said, love the Lord your God with all your.
Heart. In fact, in Isaiah 2913 it says, the Lord says, these people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship of me is based on merely human rules. They have been taught Jesus is acknowledging something about the living of life, saying, what good is it if we live our lives to a particular way, but our hearts are empty? If I gave an example like this, let me take one from my own book as a child. One time I made this mistake in my grandparents home and I will never make it again. Grandpa taught me, but I. I was angry at my grandparents house and I can remember I slammed the door and grandpa was not just after my behavior, he was also after my heart. And when I came out of the room in which I slammed the door, grandpa gave me a corrective lesson real quick. And then he had me walk back to the door and close the door again. Not just once, but five times. I had to walk down the hall and close that door, but the goal was when I did it to do it with a positive attitude. Why? Because my grandfather wasn’t just after my behavior. My grandfather was also teaching me how to be a man of respect.
He was after my heart. And when my heart responded with anger, even though I closed the door in anger the first time, that wasn’t good enough. It’s about an attitude of the heart. And so what God is after in our lives. When we talk about raising our children and instruction in the Lord, he’s just not after their conduct. That’s just behavior modification. He’s after their heart. When your child comes to you and does something wrong and you corrected it as a parent, we sell our kids short by simply correcting their behavior and watching their conduct correct. At that point, if their attitude continues to be nasty and Jesus shares the same thing in Isaiah 29, listen, I’ve given you a heart for a reason, and it’s all about relationships in this world connected to me and one another. And what good is it in this world if you behave a particular way, but your hearts are still wandering? And so the challenge to us as parents, as we think about the significance of instructing our children, is not to just go after their behavior, but go after their heart. Psalm 127 says this unless the Lord builds it, it is in vain. Which is why we seek as parents after godly children rather than just for good children. We don’t settle for anything less than what the Lord wants for their lives, and we encourage them to do that. In fact, as parents, in order to instruct our kids, we’ve got to be reminded that we really need to encourage them in their positive behavior, reinforce it when they do good things and instruction.
The Lord Jesus modeled it to us, or God showed this to us. In Zephaniah it says, the Lord your God is with you, the mighty warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you. In his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing. God in this moment is reflecting over the nation of Israel, who was being obedient to him. And notice what it says in the very end in love. He does rebuke you, because what he desires is to be in that relationship with you. And so he brings discipline into your world to draw you back to him. And he does it in love. But also when you’re obeying him and following after him, he says he will rejoice over you with singing. Think about that. As parents, when your kids do something great. Have you sung a song? You have a song for that. I can think as a parent trying to teach Greyson how to brush his teeth. He hates that. And he’s like, it’s like he’s from West Virginia. He just wants to have one tooth, I think. That is called a tooth brush for a reason, right? Not a teeth brush. You’ve heard the joke, right? I’ve heard it a lot.
I’m from West Virginia, so? So, Stacy and I, in order to get him to brush his teeth, there was one occasion where he did it very happy. And so we act ridiculous in our house. We go crazy like, Donald Duck is happy. Mickey Mouse is all happy with you. We’re all dancing around, you know, it’s wonderful what’s happened that you brush your teeth and we really highlight the behavior. We let our kids know that when they’re. When we’re training them up in the Lord, that, yes, this is the path. Yes. I’m your number one cheerleader. I am singing over you. Great job. But also as well, to discourage the wrong behavior, we bring them up in discipline in the Lord as well. I like the way that God did it in the Garden of Eden. If I reflected back to God being our father, parenting over us as children, when the first sin occurred in the Garden of Eden and God walked into the Garden of Eden, and Adam and Eve were hiding behind the fig leaves from God, it says in verse 13, then the Lord God said to the woman, what is this you have done? I think God teaches us a valuable lesson in the questions that we ask our kids as we instruct and discipline in the Lord. Rather than ask why God asked what, I think there’s something significant about that. This never surprises us kids or as parents when our kids do something wrong because our kids are sinful just as we are sinful.
We’ve got to align ourselves with Jesus’s instruction in order to learn how to live in this life in light of his relationship. It’s not something that comes naturally. Bible tells us in Romans five that we’re born in sin. The reason the Bible tells us to instruct kids in the Lord is because they don’t understand the instruction of the Lord. It’s got to be taught and directed into their lives. And so when God went into the garden, he didn’t ask Adam and Eve why he knew why they chose to not go with him. It was of sin. It was about sin. When your kid does something wrong, you don’t need to know why. You know why it’s sin. What’s important is what? When your kid does something wrong, it’s important for you as a parent to go and ask them what they did so you understand along with your child. The kid knows the reason he’s being instructed and disciplined. What did you do? I punched Johnny. And you know that was wrong. Yes. Poor Johnny. Go apologize. Here’s your discipline. The kid needs to learn what they did more than why they did it. As parents, we. We know that answer. But it tells us in Genesis three that Jesus even reflected as he saw Adam and Eve in the garden. The best way, though, was parents.
For them to learn how to follow after the Lord is instruction. Instruction is simply this through your example. It’s not about do as I say, not as I do as parents is about do as I say and as I do. God has called himself a father in the Bible for, I think, several reasons, but one of which his relationship reflects a lot of a father to a child in this world. And we have an understanding of what our relationship is like with God through a relationship with an earthly father. God cares for us. God loves us. God instructs us. God disciplines us. And the best way for a kid to learn how to follow after Jesus is to simply say, he needs to follow after your model and your example. Sometimes as parents, we make decisions to do things in this world, but we’ve also got to consider when we do those things. It may be okay for me to do those things, but it is okay for me to do those things and my child at that particular age to see those things be done. We talk about instructing a child and we, we, we bring up things like our example in the significance of that. We’ve got to understand that instruction doesn’t just mean open up your Bible and look at chapter one of verse one and let’s read it together. Instruction, according to Paul, and the way it’s used in the Greek, has to do with every area of your child’s life.
When it comes to learning about God. How do you learn about God when it comes to education or your kids learning truth and and gaining knowledge when it comes to discipline, or your kids learning to exercise discipline when it comes to life. Do your kids know what to do when it comes to a mate? Do they know how to properly choose that person? You’re instructing all areas of their life and you being their primary example. And so Paul says this to us. Bring them up as we’re instructing them that we are to also bring them up in discipline. The importance of instruction and discipline is because we as parents know when they get to teenage age, they go crazy for a while, right? They check out as they get those hormones sometimes, and they need the instruction of the Lord while they’re young to be trained up. In fact, if you ever refer to focus on the family, I would encourage our church to use that resource as much as possible. Go to focus on the family.com. It’s the largest Christian counseling network and it’s got all sorts of resources and articles for parents for every age and any situation you encounter with your kid. It’s a great resource for us to have. But when you talk about discipline and training with the kids, excuse me, I lost my place. I want us to realize that discipline is not a bad thing.
Discipline is about godliness and love. In fact, in Hebrews 12 and verse 11 it says this. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. Discipline is not a bad word. It’s it’s a loving word. In fact, Hebrews 12 six says this for those whom the Lord loves, he disciplines. Instruction and discipline for your child says to your child that you care enough about them to get involved in their world, to help them to become the individual that God desires for them to be. Discipline says, I love you enough to create these protective boundaries around you, to provide for you the way that you need to be provided for. Do you know, counseling tells us psychologically, in kids, especially between the ages of 2 to 10, the best age in which they are receiving discipline instruction in this world happens between the ages of 2 to 10. It’s important for us as parents to come with protective boundaries around them to provide for them. And one of the reasons that’s important to also discipline between the ages of 2 to 10, when your child grows and develops according to its brain maturity, one of the last things that develops in their mind is the ability to think long term about consequences for their actions. That’s why when you go to the store and you let your little kid out and they immediately want to jump out of the car and run into the street, not looking either way, and don’t think long term about consequences for the actions in which they are conducting.
But discipline provides the instruction in our life that helps them to think through. If I do this, this might be the immediate consequence at the least. Discipline, especially beginning at a young age, is important. Why? Because kids are born not knowing which way to go and the world is full of advice. And you as a parent, want to put protective boundaries around them to help them recognize, yes, there are all places in this world that this world is going to tell you to go. But me as a parent, God has put me in this position to do and I set the boundaries because I love you. Discipline is the most loving thing you can provide for a child and direction in this world. Why? Because a kid is after wisdom. We give our kid instruction in this world in order that that instruction might become wisdom to apply to their lives. And it says this in Proverbs chapter 22. Train up a child in the way he should go, and even when he is old, he’s learned its wisdom, so he’s not going to depart from it. As your child grows and matures, it doesn’t mean that they’re they’re going to as you teach them the right way.
They’re not always going to be perfect. It doesn’t even mean they’re going to do it exactly the way that you tell them to do it as they get older. But what it does mean is that it’s going to stick with them. It’s going to become a part of them. And the word old here actually means when they get whiskers. I was trying to figure out how that works for ladies. Like, my mom was going crazy. I think it’s actually it’s talking from a male perspective, but when your kid gets older, it starts getting whispers. He’s not going to part from that. Think about when does a kid get whiskers, really, when they start hitting puberty? For me, I’m never going to be able to grow a beard. So I’m still waiting on that day. But train up a child in the way you should go. And when he is old, he will not depart from it, saying to us as parents, listen, parenting your child, especially in the younger ages, is so important because as they get to get whiskers, they get to that place in their lives, they’re going to know what to follow after, and they’re going to have learned through that teaching. They’re going to have gained wisdom. Our children are not naturally inclined to do good things, though they do have a God image in them. Jeremiah 17 nine says, the heart is deceitful above all things and desperately wicked.
But here’s what discipline does. It prepares your child to be released as adults. That’s what parenting is about. Raising your child, helping your child to be matured in this world. To release them as adults. The way that we do that as parents is that we don’t prepare the path for them, but we prepare our kids for the path. You don’t have to go before your child and sweep up every bumpy road that they might come in front of. In fact, I would say that would stunt their growth more than anything. But what we need to do is prepare them for the path that waits before them. You think maybe in your own life you’ve seen the effects of what happens when a mother nurtures a child too much and doesn’t give them the opportunity to go into this world, as they’ve been trained to make some mistakes on their own. They end up 40 years old, living in your basement, doing nothing with their lives. We don’t prepare the path for our children, but we prepare our kids for the path. The important thing to recognize is we release our children as adults, is that our heritage is intended to outlive us, that we’re not just training this generation, we’re leaving a lasting effect on future generations. What were your grandchildren believe? How were your grandchildren find wisdom in this world? It says in Proverbs 1520, A wise son makes a father glad, but a foolish man despises his mother.
Paul tells us, fathers responsibility, parents, the responsibility is for us to do. Do something might not always be perfect, but do show your kid by being involved in their lives, giving them instruction and discipline and boundaries that you care about them. You love them. And so he says to us as he talks about discipline and instruction, it’s also important for us to recognize that when we discipline and when we instruct, it’s not for the purpose of provoking our kids to anger. In fact, he plainly says, don’t provoke your kids to anger. Recognizing that not all kids are raised exactly the same, and not all kids respond the same way to the same forms of discipline. But Paul does call us to discipline, and God does call us not to provoke our kids to anger. I was reading a few articles on focus on the family, just to see how they encourage parents in disciplining their kids and dealing with the issue of provoking our kids to anger. What are some of the common ways that parents tend to do this? And discipline in a way that has a negative influence on our children? These are some of the things they listed. Disciplining through anger as a parent will provoke your kid to anger. That made so much sense to me, that first one. When you discipline your kid through anger, rather it provokes your kid to anger.
The purpose of disciplining in anger is not about discipline. Rather, it’s about punishment. In anger, you lash out your to your child and you want to punish them for something they did wrong rather than understand. As a parent, your kids are going to do things wrong, and the job as a parent at that point is to simply instruct and discipline to get your child on the correct path. Discipline in anger is about punishment, um, rather than true discipline. Second is this discipline that they mentioned was discipline done to belittle? As a parent, we go to discipline or instruct our child rather than help them get to where they need to be. We talk down to them as who they are for who they are as people. We show little respect for who they are as human beings. And so rather than encourage them to bring their hearts to us as we discipline and correct, we force them away because we belittle and disrespect. That was wrong. We discipline too harshly. Some parents can go overboard, even in anger and disciplining their children. Think of a young child developing his motor skills for the first time, sitting at a table accidentally knocks over his milk. Disciplined too harshly over a spilled milk because a child doesn’t have the motor skills to to function well at the table is disciplining too harshly. Sometimes we discipline delayed.
The purpose of discipline is to immediately instruct your child to get them back into living a right life according to God, and to restore relationship because their relationships are broken in sin. When we delay that discipline, we disconnect our child in that relationship. The child lives in fear of the discipline that would come, though it lasts longer than it should before it does come. Child lives in fear of their parent rather than restoring that relationship. Not only that, when a when a young child especially is disciplined delayed, they have no cognitive ability sometimes to connect something they’ve done early with a discipline that happens in their lives later on. Discipline prolonged. I could bring up the issue of spanking here, but I’m going to encourage you to go to focus on the family as a parent. If you’ve considered that those people have far more degrees than me, and they talk about the idea of spanking versus not spanking, and several articles there, But one of the encouraging things I just want to mention when they talk about discipline is when you, as a parent choose to discipline, it’s important to do it immediately. It’s important to keep that discipline action as short as possible, and it’s important to immediately restore that relationship with discipline over a prolonged period of time. Like something like a timeout, it can be considered unloving. Let me tell you why. I know this might be new thinking for us, but the purpose of discipline is to instruct a child to bring them into right relationship.
When you were a kid, you were disciplined and thrown into timeout or punishment for 4 or 5 weeks. Remember that teenager? You do something wrong. How often did Mom or dad carry that discipline out to 4 or 5 weeks? I never for me. I was mean and it never happened. But in addition to that, during that time out that lasted 4 to 5 weeks. What was your relationship like with your parent as a teenager? I can tell you what it was like for me. It was distant. I was living in a house under punishment for weeks. I didn’t want to do that versus if I had a punishment that was immediate rather than prolonged, I could enjoy the relationship with my family once again. Sometimes we discipline legalistically within every child there is a battle that exists between independence and rebellion. Kids don’t like rules. No one likes rules. We want to rebel against it. But kids are also trying to be trained up into mature adults. And so as parents, we begin to operate in their lives with lots of boundaries. And as they get older and instructed, we should begin to loosen some of those boundaries so we don’t inflict rebellion upon them. But what we discover is that they’re developing an independence. It starts from a young age, and it grows older. When your kid’s two years old, give them an opportunity.
What do you want to wear to bed? Let them choose between two pairs of pajamas. Give them a chance to be independent and make choices when they get older. In five six years old, daddy likes vanilla ice cream, son. What kind of ice cream do you like? Give them an opportunity to express themselves. Develop that independence. Allow them to have some freedom. As we discipline in this world, you get to pick your battles, right? Sometimes we discipline too liberally or we don’t discipline at all. Can I say all the all the neglectful things I think I read here? Anger would be on the top and and not disciplining at all, I would say would have to be second. Not disciplining all stunts your child’s growth from what God has called you to do with them and in them to train them up as adults Don’t provoke your children to anger, but it’s important that we do something that we discipline and instruct. And last parents discipline without love. The point of all discipline is to teach your son or daughter how to walk with integrity in this world, and how to walk humbly with their God and live in harmony and peace with people. Teaching them respect for authority, teaching them how to live and love with those around them. By example and by words we instruct them. Discipline without love teaches your child that really discipline is a negative thing.
What discipline is about is to correct your child’s behavior, to restore it and enjoy the relationship, both as parent and child and as a family. Discipline needs to be done in such a way that your kids aren’t afraid of you, but they respect you. Discipline needs to be done in such a way that we understand that what we’re after is not behavior modification. We’re after their heart. Because if we get their heart, we get their behavior. Discipline for the purpose of helping them see where their hearts struggle and correcting them. To see how God wants their hearts to thrive. When your child sees you not provoking them to anger, but training them up and disciplining in the Lord, they will grow to trust and love you. In fact, the word discipline also comes from the root word, which means disciple. Jesus has called us all to be his disciples, and what it means as a disciple is that we are putting ourselves under a particular discipline because it’s best for us as people. You think about the word discipline as discipleship. It’s a beautiful thing, and you as parents, have no greater influence on anyone else in this world than you do with your children to make them disciples. Disciplined in Jesus. And what kids need to learn about anything else. Above all these lessons that we’ve talked about in in discipline and and anger and instructing your kids is above everything.
You love them unconditionally. In fact, Paul wrote this in Romans two. God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance and Christ’s love compels us. This is something we’ve learned about Jesus is that God is a holy God and being a holy God, God hates sin. God wants to make war on sin. God one day will judge sin. And it tells us in Romans, because we are sinful, the wrath of God rests upon us. There is punishment coming. There is discipline coming because of sin. We also learn about God is that God is a loving God. And when I look at God’s holiness, I say to myself, I am so thankful that God hates sin. Because when I look at a world that is full of corruption and murder and death and suffering and injustice. I want a holy God. I want a God that hates that stuff too. And I want a God that wants to get rid of that stuff. And I want a God that wants to also lovingly help us through that stuff. And in God’s holiness, we see that he hates sin. He disciplines sin, but God also loves you. God also in his holiness, still gives you grace And in that holiness we still see love. And that love compels us to come near him. Even though he hates sin, we draw near to him to experience that grace. More than anything, what a child needs to learn is we discipline them, is that we love them unconditionally, no matter what.
We’re after their hearts because we love them. Romans five eight says, God demonstrates his love towards us. And even though you were a sinful, nasty person, Christ died for you. Discipline and instruction does not teach a kid how to earn your love, but it teaches a kid how to experience it. It’s an important note for us to remark on and think about as we end. Discipline in a child’s life isn’t to tell them how to earn your love, but it’s to instruct them how to live harmoniously in a family in those relationships. It’s not about earning love, it’s about experiencing it. When God tells us he’s light and the world is darkness, what he wants us to do is move from that darkness into that light to experience him. We instruct our kids in the Lord. What we want them to do is move from the darkness into the light, to experience him, and also to walk with us as a family as well. Parents, the way to raise your children up is just to live a life that reflects Jesus. There is no better mission field in this world, no better place. God has called you into your own home with your children. God says for us fathers do that. We go into this world and we do, and that we instruct. We don’t provoke our children in anger, but we instruct them in discipline towards the Lord.